Good Morning everyone! I hope this beautiful, sunny day finds you well:) I'm working hard on having a positive attitude and moving foward towards feeling as well as possible.
I had my MRI's done on Wednesday and go back to the NS on 5/23 to see what he thinks my treatment plan should be. After my NL cancelled to two appointments I had with him, my primary has referred me to a new one. It amazes me that you don't get to talk to a human being when you try to get an appointment. I had to leave a message and they will get back to me...not a comforting situation LOL As far as my gastro problems go, all of the biopsies came back negative for cancer so I am relieved and feeling very blessed about that! My meeting with the surgeon for that last Thursday was very uninformative, he asked me what the gastroenterologist wanted him to do...again not very comforting! He's reviewing my chart and test results from the hospital stay, consulting with the gastro dr and will get back to me.
So, my goal for today and each and everyday is to just do me....take the best care of my self as possible, stay on track of doing all that I can to have good quality of life and being happy. Those are the things that are in my control right now....attitude, feelings, my happiness....I need to look inside myself and to God for my strength, courage and faith that I can cope with this new life. I've read so many life stories of you all and I know that while I may have alot going on right now, if you can all cope with this, than I can as well:) Thanks so much for letting me "talk" it all out here. It helps so much to know that I'm not crazy, dippy or goofy as one co-worker recently replied upon hearing I had Chiari. Sometimes I feel so very sad that I can't make people understand what it like to walk around with this in my head.
I think my husband is just in complete denial about it. He doesn't want his life to change...he wants me to just be better and resume life as it was before. I just think that I have to stop worrying about even his needs and just try to do my best to care for myself right now. It's hard because I have all of these invisible chronic illnesses going on,...and everyone says "you look great- you're better now right"...NOT REALLY!
So sorry for rambling on....just really need to get it out of my head. Does anyone else have trouble trying to get close family members to understand them? It makes me sad that he just wants to ignore the whole health situation I'm going through. I'm thinking about seeing a therapist who deals with invisiable disabilities just for my own piece of mind.